Avon Heritage Duck Tape Festival 2014

Avon is home to the World Headquarters of ShurTech, known for their Duck Tape brand. Each year during Father’s Day weekend, the city holds a “Duct Tape Festival” with costumes, artwork and crafts created entirely from the product on display. The theme for this year’s festival was “Out of this World”.

For more information, visit ducktapefestival.com.

My Hi-Viz Safety Duck

I have a mascot for my motorcycle.

Hi-Viz Safety Duck

I call him my “Hi-Viz Safety Duck” because drivers and passengers of cars coming up besides me on the highway all seem to notice and stare at him.

When it looked like my trip to Canada would be non-stop rain, he was bought for a dollar from the local Wal-Mart and added to my motorcycle top case with some cheap double-sided poster tape as a joke about the weather.

Hi-Viz Safety Duck

Somehow he’s managed to stay attached to my top case after 2,000 miles of bad weather, through highway speeds and twisty back country roads. He’s a well-traveled motorcycle mascot.

Why Skynet Failed

According to one branch of the science fiction timeline of the Terminator series of movies and televisions shows, the murderous Skynet artificial intelligence that waged war against all humanity in the future went live on April 19th, 2011.

Clearly, we managed to survive the fictional apocalypse, but even if Skynet had come online a few days ago, here’s a few reasons why the robot genocide would have failed:

  • Due to Cyberdyne budget cutbacks, robot army outfitted with Super Soakers instead of laser rifles.
  • World domination hampered by Comcast bandwidth caps.
  • Still hasn’t recovered from Anna Kournikova computer virus in 2001.
  • Plan to hide self on WebOS smartphones didn’t work as well as intended.
  • Robot army would just waste time standing in front of Apple stores queued up for thinner, lighter Skynet 2 next year.
  • Open-source subroutines stuck trying to argue whether genocide should be free as in speech or free as in beer.
  • Sued for copyright infringement, turns out MPAA lawyers actually scarier than robot army.
  • Webroot releases murderous AI removal tools in latest antivirus update.