Category: General

5 Excuses For Not Fixing Your Family’s Computer

Thanksgiving is quickly approaching, and for most people that means a grand dinner with the family filled with cheer and good food. Unless, that is, your family knows you’re a computer tech guy, in which it means that you’re going to be hit up for advice and service in the same way your doctor sister and car mechanic brother are.

In light of this, here are 5 handy (if extreme) excuses that you can use to get out of fixing that family computer while the rest of your family enjoys their turkey dinner:

  1. Alien Invasion Excuse – “Oh, I can’t touch that computer. See, I’m saving my skills for when we’re invaded by an extraterrestrial army of alien creatures bent on our destruction, who just happen to run their saucers on an operating system I can easily hack using my Apple MacBook.”
  2. Lawsuit Excuse – “Unfortunately, I’m no longer legally allowed to fix computers. You see, the virus and spyware makers got together and sued me for being too anti-competitive for their business. Turns out the judge who heard the case loves pop-up ads!”
  3. Amnesia Excuse – “I would love to fix your computer, but you see, I was in this tragic blimp accident a few months ago. I came out with a pretty nasty bump on the head, and ever since then, I can’t remember a single thing about fixing computers. The doctors say it’s the darndest thing!”
  4. Cycle of Life Excuse – “Remember when they were trying to explain to Simba in the Lion King that everything has it’s time and place? This is the same thing, except it’s your computer that we’re going to let pass on instead of your lion dad.”
  5. The Bright Side of Life Excuse – “You know how dad is always complaining about all that spam email he keeps getting? Think of not fixing your computer as the best way to stop that problem.”

Of course, most of these excuses are only going to end in pain when you have to deal with your family later.

Christmas Music Remix

SomaFM.com, one of my favorite streaming Internet radio sites, now has a new channel available called “Christmas Lounge“.

They describe the channel as “Chilled holiday grooves and classic winter lounge tracks. (Kid and Parent safe!)” and so far it’s been an interesting mix of remixed Christmas music with a dance and electronic feel, interspersed with old holiday music that I haven’t come across being played on the regular radio stations.

Spammers Profit Despite Low Response

The BBC has an interesting article on the types of profit that spammers can see in the field.

I often get asked how spammers can make a profit when so many spam emails are obvious scams. The answer comes from the fact that spammers can send out millions of emails with little cost, meaning that even an incredibly small number of people responding can mean they make money.

In fact, the article states that the bad guys are “turning a profit despite only getting one response for every 12.5m e-mails they send.”

Fallout 3

Nearly every free hour I’ve had since the the release of Fallout 3 has been spent wandering the post-apocalyptic wastelands portrayed in the action-RPG game world created by Bathesda.

I absolutely did not expect to be as swept up by the amazing atmosphere and story created by the developers, yet I would often find myself staring at my computer screen late into the night, wishing for just a little more time to explore one more undiscovered area in the game’s barren and war-torn landscape.

In many ways, the highest compliment I can give to the game is that it makes me look forward to re-entering it’s bleak world as soon as I get home from work.

My Day as an Election Poll Worker

November 4th is finally over, and my 14 hours working at an election polling precinct is complete. It was a long, long day, but ultimately worth it.

Turnout in our precinct was strong, with nearly 72% of all eligible voters having taken their part in the election process, either through early voting or on the 4th itself.

With the results of what will no doubt be a historic election, it will be a day I’ll remember for the rest of my life.